The Eagles couldn’t have played more against a hangover if they had spent Wednesday night at South Street. The commanders smelled even worse.

The NFC East’s two best teams delivered three hours of essentially sleepwalking play in a short week of showcasing why Thursday Night Football is a crime against nature. The Eagles played a road game Sunday in Dallas, with a three-hour flight bringing them back to town after midnight. The Commanders lost a grueling home game by one point to the Steelers on Sunday, then were scheduled to be in Philadelphia on Wednesday night.

The game ended 26-18 and Saquon Barkley had two big touchdowns, but the first three quarters were uglier than the Commanders’ helmets.

What does that mean, then?

That means the Eagles, now 8-2 and leading the division, can win without their fastball.

That means they can beat a good team: the Commanders were 7-3.

This means they have real momentum; six straight wins, with each starter healthy, and nine days off before heading to the Rams.

Both teams were flatter than Jason Kelce on the Eagles’ annual Christmas album. The Commanders were the No. 4 offense and the Eagles were No. 7, but they had totaled 16 points in nearly 48 minutes of play. It was 88.5 on Thursday.

Jalen Hurts was about as accurate as Nick Sirianni’s enunciation. His passer rating over the last five games was 126.1.

Eagles kicker Jake Elliott missed left like he was from the Democratic Party. Elliott made his first two kicks, 44 yards in the first quarter and 51 yards in the second, and had an extra point in the fourth. He made two more field goals and two extra points, but $6 million kickers are expected to connect at better than 57 percent.

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With the exception of Eagles defensive tackle Jalen Carter, defensive end Brandon Graham, Commanders guard Austin Ekeler and, of course, Barkley, both teams looked in trouble most of the night. So it’s no surprise that it was little-used Kenny Gainwell who carried the club on the go-ahead run in the fourth quarter. He gained 34 yards on three straight carries that set up Hurts’ Tush Tush TD to make it 12-10 with 12 minutes left.

Inexplicably, late in their next possession, the Commanders denied an opportunity to take the lead midway through the fourth quarter when they opted to attempt a fourth-and-2 play instead of a 43 yard field goal. Reed Blankenship overthrew quarterback Jaylen Daniels before Zack Baun ran him out of bounds, well before the first down.

Even more inexplicably, early in the second quarter, the Eagles suffered a 13-yard sack on a reverse that required two handoffs, a long block and skill – in short, it took a lot of practice. Why would you even try a play like this inconsistent backhand during a week in which you had zero days of full-speed practice?

Maybe the coaches were tired too.

Even some of the best pieces looked sloppy. Dallas Goedert caught a 31-yard pass but had the ball taken away while he was tackled (Grant Calcaterra recovered it).

Two plays later, on third and third from the Commanders’ 23, the visitors collapsed. Barkley rushed for a touchdown, and neither Commander could muster the energy to catch it.

Blankenship intercepted Daniels on the Commanders’ next offensive play, just the third pick on the rookie’s first run through the league.

Barkley quickly bombarded the Commanders again, this time from 39 yards, and it was all but over.

Fortunately.

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