The Sam/Joel relationship is arguably the headliner when it comes to why someone somewhere is such a winner of a show. It’s proof that this series understands and cares about the importance of platonic friendships. (And the on-screen chemistry between Brigitte Everett And Jeff Hiller is unmatched, which doesn’t hurt.) But if you’ve been sleeping about how beautiful and complex and accessible Sam and Tricia’s sisterly relationship is, oh, I hope “What If It Spreads?” I woke you up from this mistake. When we first met the Miller sisters in season one, they could barely stand being together, but since they’ve been through some pretty shitty things together – the loss of their sister Holly, Tricia’s divorce, all that happened with their parents – they came to rely on each other. And yes, that support includes both wiping away tears when your sister cries over her feelings for a man and also one sister inspecting each other’s vaginas for venereal diseases. The bonds of brotherhood contain multitudes.

If you need a quick refresher on the dynamic between Sam and Tricia, look no further than when Tricia arrives in her Escalade 45 minutes earlier than she told Sam, sipping from her giant Stanley Cup , and asks his sister to get in the car so they can get to the Great Plains Event Expo in Kansas City early – it’s important! Sam says sure, and then she moves as slowly as possible while getting ready, just to get into her sister’s shoes. In her defense, Sam has been really sweating it out with those Billy Blanks tae-bo workouts (change is hard, but she’s following doctor’s orders!), and the Event Expo isn’t really her stage; it’s for Tricia to inspire and network – she shows up all over the Midwest, remember – and Sam is just there to support you. She says it very clearly: “It’s your people, they terrify me, too many teeth. »

And yet the whole setup gives Sam and Tricia plenty of time to bond. Sam has some strange news to share: she found love letters their mother wrote to their father hidden at home. They are both rightly horrified and angry that they never got to see this side of their parents’ relationship, instead of only enduring the toxic parts of it. Sam readily admits that this is why his attitude towards marriage is so fucked up. She has a lot of insecurity about dating, but being damaged by her own parents’ relationship certainly doesn’t help.

Hey, speaking of being damaged by people from your youth, we should talk about Joel and Brad’s little storyline in this episode. Sam isn’t the only one being dragged into an event she’d like to attend in the name of supporting someone she loves; While she is at the expo, Joel attends a men’s Bible book club with Brad. They talk about “grace and growing old” and I never wanted to jump into a river and get carried away further, to be honest. Joel isn’t enthusiastic about the theme either, but that’s not his biggest concern. Most of the time he worries about being in a male-only space. “Any place without women seems terrifying,” he tells Sam.

He shares his fears with Brad, someone who Joel says is great at fitting in with the guys. Joel could never do that. “It’s muscle memory for me,” Brad told him. He is older than Joel and comes from a time where he had no choice but to try to fit into a very narrow definition of masculinity. Someone Somewhere is a series that excels at subtlety, never hitting you over the head with the point it’s trying to make and instead letting the great character work that’s been built up over three seasons do its thing. That’s certainly the case here, as the series explores not only how Joel and Brad’s age difference shapes their relationship, but also how growing up as gay men in relatively different eras has shaped them as individuals . Like so many scenes in this series, this one is quiet but effective. And also, like so many scenes in this series, it ends by reminding us that this is also a comedy, and I’m sorry but if Tim Bagley isn’t nominated for every award for his work this season — a few weeks ago singing with all her sweet little heartbecoming the stupidest road rage monster this week – there is no justice in this world.

The conversation in the car also perfectly illustrates the interaction Joel has with a man named Brett at the Bible group. We didn’t learn much about Joel’s experience growing up, other than some information about how he tried to hide who he was, but never succeeded, and you can imagine how hard that would have been. could have been scary for a gay kid growing up in Manhattan, Kansas. And then who should get into the study group, if not Joel’s former high school bully. We don’t need to know the details to immediately understand that Joel is still hurting a lot from everything that happened. Brett apologizes and Joel tries to brush it off with an “it’s okay”, even though he’s clearly crying. And while I don’t expect the two to have any sort of additional healing, the moment has a beautiful effect on our Joel.

Back in the car, after Brad asks him if he’s okay, he finally talks about the things he needs to make their relationship work, the things he’s hiding from Brad. He needs to spend more time with his friends. He must be allowed to load the dishwasher. He should put pictures of the people he loves on the refrigerator. These aren’t complicated requests, but they are important to Joel – things that may have healed some of that childhood trauma, things that make him happy or make him feel safe. If just letting the man load the dishwasher can do all of this, no matter how crazy his technique may be, you let the man load the dishwasher. And Brad understands that. All Joel had to do was ask. Life is too short, my babies.

Sam and Tricia also discover what’s on the other side of being open and vulnerable with each other. And I mean really vulnerable. I guess I also mean very open when thinking about logistics.

The Expo is going very well. All of Tricia’s protests are bearing fruit. She learns so much, she prepares for the big event at Mitch’s Country Club and she even gets close to the big star of the event, Cathleen-with-aC, or “the Joanna Gaines of the Midwest.” It’s his time, baby! She feels alive. She feels untouchable. She feels so alive and untouchable that she doesn’t force Sam to go up and do karaoke at the big mixer and instead She takes the microphone. Tricia is on top of the world.

Until she was in the bathroom. And there it burns. So much burn. She is beside herself and wonders what it could be. Maybe it’s just a urinary tract infection, she wonders. But all of us, Sam and Tricia included, know it’s not a UTI even before Sam crosses the line into a brotherly bond you can never come back from and takes a look at Tricia’s vagina to see what’s going on there. It’s about half a second before Sam can actually confirm, there’s no chance it’s a urinary tract infection. After further research, Sam thinks it’s chlamydia, which really isn’t that big of a deal in the grand scheme of STDs.

Tricia is angry. Who could have given him that?! How could this happen?! And then it occurs to him: Rick. Yes, that Rick.

Sam is outraged! Tricia is outraged! We are all outraged! Apparently Rick stopped by recently and gave Tricia a whole song and dance about how much he missed her and that she was feeling bad and also drunk. The cut of Tricia in the shower going absolutely wild on Rick’s dirty cock is perfect. Mary Catherine Garrison in this entire sequence is perfection. Sam is disgusted when Tricia throws her underwear out the shower door and they land on Sam’s foot, also perfect. You don’t think this episode could get any better and then someone somewhere deftly shifts from that perfect comedy to something surprising and adorable, and honestly any show that can go so easily from making me cry with laughter to making me cry because emotionsWell, this is the kind of show I want to immerse myself in forever and ever.

The Miller sisters are in bed quietly processing the events of the day. While things have calmed down because of the “sick asshole” situation – a trip to urgent care in the morning is planned – Tricia can see that something is on Sam’s mind. The entire conversation that follows illustrates not only how far these sisters have come in their relationship, but also honors it. Sam admits that she’s anxious about a man, but knows that nothing will ever come of it because, well, nothing will ever come of it. She wants Tricia, who refuses to accept that Sam gives up before even starting, to be serious. But Tricia is serious. She thinks Sam should just ask her out – what’s the worst that could happen? Sam probably has a list of terrible things that could happen if she puts herself in danger, but Tricia pushes back. “There is nothing to fear. Nobody knows what they are doing. Person. You… do it,” she said to her sister. None of this is said with any judgment or condescension – you can see how much Tricia wants her sister to bet on herself for once. When Sam starts crying and calls her tears stupid, Tricia wipes them away and makes sure she knows how stupid this whole thing isn’t.

As a real Miller sister – and someone somewhere – form, we don’t end in tears. The conversation turns to laughter about manifesting what you want for yourself and questions about whether or not Tricia manifested her little STD gift. The next morning, Sam teases Tricia about the antibiotics she has to take for her new friend and Tricia teases Sam that the guy she’s talking about is Iceland, because yes, of course she went through her phone. sister. But there’s also this great recognition that Sam and Tricia care for each other. You know these two didn’t have any type of relationship that resembled this when they were younger, so the fact that they have a chance now is such a gift. And not in a sarcastic way like Tricia’s STD gift, but, like, a real gift. You understand.

• Joel to Brad when he offers to drive home after Joel’s emotional encounter: “I don’t think I can risk a road rage incident when I’m feeling this fragile.” » I steal this line and use it even in non-vehicle situations.

• To dislike, emphasize this point (the fact is that Mary Catherine Garrison is amazing in this episode), but the way Garrison shouts the phrase “waving that dirty dick all over town” should be studied. It’s art.

• End the episode with “None of Your Business” by Salt-N-Pepa? Just when I thought I couldn’t love this series anymore.