Most parents would probably admit to having a preferred gender when expecting a baby. However, most would agree that it really doesn’t matter in the end. When the baby finally arrives, his joy eclipses everything else.

However, a mother simply could not do this, and it greatly affected her son. In fact, she seems to be resentful towards her firstborn because he was not born a girl.

A mother who only wanted daughters was never able to go from being a son to her firstborn.

A 16 year old boy went to Reddit to share his sad story and seek advice on his own reaction.

“My mother never wanted a boy,” he explained. “She wanted girls. Apparently her dream was to have four daughters. But she got me… first.

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The teenage son then detailed painful reminders of his mother’s disappointment in him.

“I saw photos and videos from the day I was born. She cried hysterically when they told her I was a boy,” he said. “Then she refused to hold me. After we got cleaned up, she cried because she didn’t didn’t use the name she chose and said she didn’t know how to get through it. It was all filmed.

Fortunately, his paternal grandmother stepped in to care for him until she passed away eight years later.

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“My mother had my sister ‘Lily’ two years after me,” he continued. “So mom had her daughter and Lily got all her attention.”

“My mom and Lily are very close and mom loves Lily,” he said.

“Lily has the biggest room, she gets the presents, she gets all her favorite snacks, she gets to do all the extracurricular activities she could want and her birthdays are big parties with huge presents.”

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The son’s behavior begins to reflect his feelings of neglect.

“My mother’s family doesn’t really try to make up for my lack of parental love,” he said. “And these last two years Mom and I have been arguing more and I’m giving her a hard time. Dad is never there to give him one. But mom? If she wants to ignore me, she can hear about how (expletive) it is and if she wants to treat my sister like a perfect angel, she can hear about it.

Unfortunately, his extended family doesn’t help him. “We were at Mom’s parents’ house on Friday and Mom was delighted that Lily was doing good on a project and the scooter she had given her to help her get around more easily… She couldn’t stop talking about it and I told her that she really loved showering her favorite in gifts and praise.

Instead of supporting him, his family sided with his mother. “My mother’s family told me that I should take it easier with her and that I needed to understand that we had ‘a few little problems’ because of Mom’s disappointment in gender matters,” he said. sharing. “I told them I didn’t owe him anything (expletive) because she had a gender disappointment and that I didn’t ask to be born to a mother who only wanted girls. They told me I lacked adult understanding and compassion.

Gender disappointment is a very real thing.

Even though we don’t talk about it often, Parents Magazine confirmed that gender disappointment occurs when a parent experiences “feelings of sadness and disappointment when the the sex of your future baby is different from what you expected.”

However, parents also noted that gender disappointment usually does not last. “Indeed, for many parents, the disappointment disappears once you meet your little one,” they said.

Continuing to treat your son poorly during his teenage years because you wanted a girl goes beyond disappointing.

It’s a resentment that truly borders on abuse. This mom should have accepted that she had a son and been happy to have a healthy baby instead of letting her bitterness fester.

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Mary-Faith Martinez is a writer for YourTango covering entertainment, current affairs and human interest topics.