It’s official. It’s over. It’s been over for quite a while now. So why are you still stuck with your ex?

You might think you’re doing your best to move on, but somehow you just can’t get away from him. Truth be told, even if you’re not making physical contact, you may be fooling yourself with a lot of sneaky and subtle behaviors that keep you connected and prevent you from meeting someone new!

Breaking up can be difficult to do. We may be attached to the other person and have difficulty letting go. However, not having a clean break can be confusing for either party. Keeping what seems like innocent relationships can send a signal that you want to get back together, or it gets in the way of making a future connection with someone new.

Here are 10 subtle ways an ex stays in your life, even after you break up:

1. You always stalk them on social media

Are you play super detective on Facebook several times a day to find out what the ex is doing or if there is someone new in the picture? Do everything you can to avoid this treacherous trap. This will only make you angry or sad – which won’t help you achieve the healthy mindset you need to stay strong and move forward, like explained by 2015 research.

2. You still keep memories of it in the house

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Until you have not only removed them and their belongings from your room, but marked the room as yours, their energy will permeate the bed, sheets, closets, and walls. This room should become your room, your space, your sanctuary, and the best way to do that is with a little redecoration.

Even minor changes like new pillowcases and bedspread, rearranging the furniture arrangement, or a new piece of art can change the way you feel about the room because they act as symbols of change and you remind us that life is centered on the “new you” in doing it now. Open the window and clean, clean, clean your ex from your bed, your dreams and your space.

RELATED: 8 Ways The Most Compelling Women Reinvent Themselves After Every Breakup

3. You save all their old messages

Do you record and replay past texts or listen to old phone messages? Reliving the past can send you down the rabbit hole quickly. You’ll start a whole vicious cycle of wondering where everything went wrong – blaming yourself, then your ex, then you again, totally enmeshed in an ended relationship, like suggested by a study carried out in the Journal of Student Psychotherapy. It’s time to delete, delete, delete!

4. You continue to socialize with loved ones

Do you stay in touch with your ex’s family and friends? Do you secretly hope that they will put in a good word for you or that they will realize what a fool they were for leaving you?

A a study carried out by researcher Kien Tran shows how you will find that this tactic will backfire because any communication you have with them after the breakup will only keep them alive in your mind and heart. Unless there are children involved, do yourself a favor and let go of those ties.

RELATED: 5 New (And Not So New) Spiritual Tools The Most Resilient People Use to Overcome a Broken Heart

5. Your accounts are mixed up

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I haven’t just heard clients say this, at one point I even said it myself: “Oh, it doesn’t matter that we’re not legally divorced yet – we both know we’re done and we moved on.” Fake. It matters. It’s closure on another level, officially marking the end of part of your life and confirming a new beginning.

Take the time, do the paperwork and legally divorce. Trust me, you will feel different when you hold these papers in your hand. It may have made financial sense to have the same calling plan when you were a couple, but saving $35 a month isn’t a good idea financially, it’s a way to stay connected to your ex.

We are financially linked. Shared mortgages, joint debts, investments, tax returns and vehicle payments: having the ex involved in financial matters keeps their presence alive in your mind and in your life. Worse yet, things could become stressful if they don’t do their part to meet their financial obligations. Take steps now to divide and clean up the mess as best you can; Autonomy also means financial autonomy.

6. You keep asking them for advice or help

If the only person you can think of to solve a problem or move a heavy box is your ex, you may be looking for ways to stay in touch. Google is a modern-day miracle for answering the most complex problems, and if a box is heavy or furniture needs to be moved, other people can help.

7. You keep old photos clearly visible

Do you still have photos of the two of you displayed in your home or on your computer screensaver? The images stimulate desire and tug at your heartstrings, making you reminisce about what was and could have been. They can weaken you and cause you to reach out or keep you emotionally tied to the past. If you want to move forward, get rid of it pronto!

RELATED: How to Move On When You Have a Big Open Wound in Your Heart

8. You visit places you know they will be

If you find yourself frequenting these old familiar places or continually stopping by to see if their car is in the parking lot, you may need to break up with your ex. Finding new hangouts is a good way to meet new people and rebuild your self-image. demonstrated by a study carried out in the Personal Relationship Journal. It’s also a thoughtful gesture to spare your ex the discomfort of ever meeting you once you’re with someone new.

9. You refuse to return their stuff

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Withholding items or refusing to cooperate amicably with the details of the separation can be a great way to stay in touch. Sometimes negative communication it’s better than no communication and it could be a way to make you think you’ve gotten over your ex, so maybe you’re being stubborn because the truth is you’re not.

10. You continue to live in the same house

Whatever the reasons, from financial convenience to children to legal issues, when someone is still living in the same house as their ex, it’s time to break up.

RELATED: Why People Crave Physical Contact With Their Exes — Even If It’s Bad News

Sherri Nickols is an award-winning author, motivational speaker, and relationship and women’s empowerment coach.

Faith Deeter, MFT, is a relationship strategist and teacher. Since 1994, she has helped people improve their lives by leading workshops for teens, providing continuing education to law enforcement, and teaching federal prison inmates. She has also been a guest lecturer at Johns Hopkins University.

Delaine Moore is an author, speaker and therapist whose memoir, The secret life of a single motherinspired a Lifetime movie of the same title.