Neglecting needs – “This might look like canceling plans with a friend or skipping yoga class to go on a date,” says therapist Alison McKleroy.

Driven by destiny – “The idea of ​​destiny determines their decisions; they believe that love is predetermined or written in the stars,” says dating expert Jasmine Diaz.

Ignoring red flags – “Hopeless romantics can sometimes overlook problems that they believe are solvable or are just a coincidence,” says Goldberg. “They may overlook a person’s problematic, hurtful, avoidant, and dishonest qualities,” agrees Harrison.

Refuse to think – “Hopeless romantics hyper-focus on the potential of a bright future and don’t like to ruminate on the past,” says licensed therapist Priya Rednam-Waldo.

Waiting for the eternal limerence – “They may believe that the perfect marriage is one that immediately ignites sparks that never go out,” says Goldberg.

I only talk about love – “Love is always the subject – it’s all they talk, think and dream about. Friendships can become one-sided,” says certified addiction and trauma counselor Audrey Hope.

How to Stop Being a Hopeless Romantic

It’s important to note that being a hopeless romantic is only negative if it causes distress or derails some aspect of your life. So the question isn’t really whether you should give up being a romantic idealist, but rather how to better balance your expectations with reality. “The key lies in how this romantic vision influences life and relationships,” says Paruolo. “Does it inspire personal growth and a deeper appreciation of love, or does it lead to repeated disappointments? »

If the answer leans in favor of the latter solution, you probably need to refocus. Take the time to identify the beliefs behind your behavior. “It’s important to ask yourself why you’re seeking love and validation from a romantic partner,” advises Haywood Stewart. “If the answer seems too much to handle alone, seek therapy. This can help you focus on yourself and improve your relationships with others.

As with most matters of the heart, the old adage about loving yourself before you can love another is also true here. “The foundation of any strong relationship with another person begins with a strong relationship with yourself,” says Rednam-Waldo.

After all, real life and love can be complicated, and the people we care about are often imperfect and always complex – just like ourselves. Everyone deserves a partner who truly sees them for who they are, not just through a cinematic lens. “Relationships are work, not just passion and fireworks,” says psychotherapist Fatemeh Farahan. “Instead of chasing big moments, start looking for love in the small, everyday gestures. This is where the magic really happens. Love is not a constant whirlwind – it is built brick by brick through trust, effort and mutual respect.