Jeannie May has some wisdom to share with women unsure about motherhood.

“For the woman who isn’t quite ready to be a mom and maybe doubts herself, it’s no big deal,” the TV host, 45, tells PEOPLE exclusively while attending the It’s A Wonderful Lifetime Christmas event on Tuesday (November 19) in Los Angeles. . “These are valid feelings that you need to lean on.”

May, who welcomed her daughter Monaco with her ex-husband Jeezy in January 2022, says her own parenting journey helped her understand what was driving her own doubts about becoming a mom.

“I think the best thing about being a mom is that I admit that I doubted myself and didn’t know why I had so many barriers around my own abilities,” said the former co-host of The real explain.

“And I learned that it came from a lot of childhood trauma… things that happened in my childhood that I blamed myself for. I still carry guilt (because) I have resentment towards people,” she adds.

“These are not things I should bring as a mom,” the TV personality continues. “But they exist. And so, that’s not to say that you should make them disappear, but it’s about knowing that they’re there to recognize them and make a clear distinction between who you are today and where you were then.”

Mai says she believes doubt has power because it can lead to self-reflection and, ultimately, acceptance.

“These doubts and all these feelings are part of why you’re going to become an explosive mom,” she shares. “You just have to lean in, really understand where it’s coming from and take ownership of it.”

Mai also recalls her earlier, extremely public stance on her desire not having children – and how much his perspective has changed since Monaco came into his life.

“I think the most exciting (thing) that came out (in recent years) that I never imagined could happen to me was becoming a mom. I was famous on (The real) for not wanting to have children. And I was about that life. I was outside,” she said.

“Now it’s my stroller. It’s outside,” she continues, laughing. “It’s like a very different part of me that I could never imagine being different. And I’ve also learned a lot about myself from becoming a mom.”

Mai also found that her priorities have completely changed.

“Work became my side hustle. Even being a part of this movie, Monaco was by my side,” she says, referring to her new Lifetime holiday movie. Christmas in the spotlight.

THE What do I look like? The star says she wants to be a role model for her daughter, who turns 3 on January 11. “I do everything to teach him,” she says. “I’m doing everything I can to get to know myself so I can teach her the best side of being a woman.”

Christmas in the spotlightwhich is inspired by the real relationship between Taylor Swift And Travis Kelce, follows a pop star who sparks an unexpected romance with a professional footballer. Mai plays the singer’s manager.

The film also stars Jessica Lord, Laith Wallschleger and Haley Kalil.

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Christmas in the spotlight premieres Saturday, November 23 at 8 p.m. ET on Lifetime.